It was an extremely quiet/boring day at work.
[Following a period of silence, whilst security-tagging a stack of clothes]
Mark: Have I gone to the toilet today or not?
Mark: Crap, I didn't mean to say that. Just thinking out loud.
Mark: How embarrassing...
Ben: If you swallowed a USB drive worth 400 bucks and pooped it out, would you reach into the toilet and grab it?
Renae: Ummm, if I was wearing rubber gloves.
Ben: Ok, what about if I pooped it out?
Renae: What!? No, I'd get you to get it!
Ben: But what if I was disabled? And couldn't move my arms?
Renae: Well, I guess I would if I had gloves. And a mask. And goggles. And a whole suit.
Ben: What? Why would you need goggles? What's going to fly into your eye from the toilet?
Renae: Well if you're swallowing USBs and disabled, anything could happen!
She shrells sea hells by the sea whore.
Sometimes I wish I was born in the future.
But then I remember how chilled Earth is without the Borg screwing with us.
Large Hadron Colider trying to destroy itself from... →
“A pair of otherwise distinguished physicists have suggested that the hypothesized Higgs boson, which physicists hope to produce with the collider, might be so abhorrent to nature that its creation would ripple backward through time and stop the collider before it could make one, like a time traveler who goes back in time to kill his grandfather.” Now that is a freaking cool theory!
Google Street View Guys A new College Humor cartoon! Ever wonder what it’s like for the dudes who have to drive those Google camera cars around? I think it’s a little something like this… (Via danmeth)
Nick: The story's going to be about a guy waiting to catch a bus when he desperately needs to take a poo.
Ben: It'll probably have a whole 'Frank Spencer' feel to it; one problem leading to another with the toilet being blocked and everything.
Ian: Well I guess this is the one time I can get away with saying it's a 'crap' story...
Ian: I'm expecting great things from you guys in your next production.
Ian: And I don't say that to every group.
Ben: Ha, I bet you say THAT to every group too...
Ben: ...And then I end up just procrastinating.
Renae: What does procrastinating mean?
Renae: Well sorry I'm not as intalecatual-